so a while ago i went to her funeral… and it’s the second most difficult thing i have ever done. when i had to go up and put a rose on the coffin i almost blacked out, but when i got up there all i could think about was how tiny the coffin was???? like she wasn’t a tiny woman???? she was tall, and she certainly wasn’t super skinny or anything.. THE COFFIN WAS SO TINY. and i feel so fucking strange because that was all i could think about?
don’t take your own life, you might think that no one cares, but GOD think about how many lives you’ve touched????? we weren’t that close, hell, i met her like 3-5 times a year??? BUT IT STILL HURTS SO FUCKING MUCH IT’S UNBELIEVABLE.
i still want to die, but i won’t take my own life, and that’s a fucking promise.
sure, i don’t have many friends, no partner, no whatever else, but i’ve must touched at least a hundred lives in the years i’ve lived.
so, while if i died it probably wouldn't ruin anyone’s life, i’m certain some people would still miss me, and that is enough.